1. Stop - Sassy mes
Walls of our home,
Are Not Enough to save us ,
So stop justifying our oppression
For that
She was eight when raped
Which part was provoking you
So stop your chauvinism
By that
Her uncle molested her
When noones around
So stop blaming her socializing habit
For that
2. Not A Victim Anymore - Troy Dayln Bunker
Where once there was love, now only is pain,
I'll never have innocence, ever again.
He took it from me, my childhood,
he took away, all that was good.
Some mornings I, still wake up and cry,
others I curl up, and hope to die.
A knife at my throat, a hand on my ass,
I lay there and scream, but the pain doesn't pass.
He threatens to kill them, my mom and my dad,
if I tell them the truth, tell them he's bad.
So after he's done, I don't even fight,
I lay there and cry, the rest of the night.
My parents return, through the open door,
now I can't be his victim, anymore.
I have to hide it, what happened to me,
if I'm to protect them, they can't see.
I'm broken inside, a husk of a boy,
I have no life, I'm just his toy.
My parents depart, and he's back for more,
I feel like I'm dead, as I lay on the floor.
The pain never lessens, not one little bit,
just keeps deepening, like a bottomless pit.
He leaves again, opening the door,
says to be ready, when he wants more.
So I continue to lie, hide the pain inside,
wondering why, I shouldn't have died.
But now it makes sense, more and more,
I can't be his victim, anymore.
So when he returns, I steal the knife,
tell him to leave, get out of my life.
My parents return, and see my pain,
but I stopped it, from happening again.
I tell them the truth, what happened to me,
They told me they're sorry, now that they see.
But still I am broken, for still I see him,
still I'm in pain, for still I'm a victim.
I'll never get past it, the nights I was raped,
it's part of it now, how I was shaped.
I can't get justice, it's been too long
but it's not my fault, he was wrong.
One of these days, I hope to heal,
one of these days, I'll get him for real.
Now that you know, you know the truth,
so finally, I'll drop the pretense of youth.
I'm not the little boy, who was raped on the floor,
I promise myself, I'm not a victim anymore.
3. Someday I`ll Never Forget
You were a friend of mine
Before you attacked me.
I told you I wasn't ready,
So you took over.
I was alone at home.
It was late. Dark.
You called me,
Asked me to come over.
We were partners for a school project.
You wanted to work on it. How did I not see?
I didn't hear the anger in your voice.
I went into my room, the look in your eyes.
It was hungry, murderous.
I fought against you when you lunged at me; I tried to be strong.
You used to tease me about being weak, before you were mean.
I was pinned, hurting, I wanted to close my eyes and forget everything:
Who I was, who you were, what was happening.
I wanted to tap my shoes together and go home.
That only happens in fairy tales. This was far from one.
For the next few weeks every time you called me I went over.
You threatened to hurt my family, friends.
I spent my nights doing exactly what you wanted me to, pleasing you, making you happy.
You spent the nights tearing apart my soul.
You had everything worked out so you could be happy.
"All I ever wanted was you." That's what you'd say.
After a while I felt ill, I felt sick.
What do you know? Pregnant with twins.
It was impossible to hide. I couldn't. I was shamed and terrified.
Angry as ever, you came right back and attacked me again.
I fought you all night, crying and screaming. You were inside, hurting.
It took me months after that before I was able to tell on you.
By then you figured out there was a child in the equation.
By then you had tried to kill me.
But I grew up fast.
Your words are empty threats to me now.
Your words are not heard by me anymore. I've grown deaf to them.
I see you sometimes; you should be in prison and you might be when I testify.
A shudder always runs up my spine.
Sometimes I feel as if you're still there, on top of me.
I have nightmares, I wake up screaming like I did when it really happened.
As much as you hurt me, I owe you thanks as well.
You made me who I am. I still have a death wish, but then I just look at my two daughters.
They don't look at all like you.
Someday I'll tell them what their father did.
Someday I'll come back and haunt you, like you do to me.
Someday I'll forget.
5. My Heart Skips A Beat
When I see you,
My heart skips a beat.
I don't want to admit it,
But I'm accepting defeat.
I've liked you for a while,
Maybe a while too long.
It's not like a fairy tale
Or a stupid love song.
You just walk by me;
You don't even look.
I wish that you would
'Cause it's my heart that you took.
I doubt that you know it,
But I could be wrong.
If you feel it too
I wonder how strong.
Then one day I see you walking;
You're only a few steps behind.
Maybe you do it to
To see if I mind.
You come up from behind me;
I have nowhere to run.
I used to really like you,
But this is no fun.
You are everywhere I go,
Around every corner I turn.
The sight of your face
Makes me skin start to burn.
That look on your face,
Like I'm your fresh meat.
When I see you,
My heart skips a beat.
6. The Monster That Ruined Me - Christina Deubner
Life became a blur,
Getting caught where we were.
I never get sleep,
And constantly find myself at weep.
can't get the monster out of my head,
And he won't let me off my bed.
He keeps coming closer to me,
I don't want him; can't he see?
That night is all I can think of,
I wish I were somewhere up above.
Floating somewhere; being gone,
That doesn't sound so wrong.
He hurt me; scared me deep,
And his memories I have to keep.
Always turning to drugs,
Being torn apart by his bugs.
Fading away into nothing,
Only wishing I were something.
Who is it I blame,
Help carry my shame?
Not him you see,
But instead little ugly me!
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